Jam Hands
by Maran-DUH
Summary: You get to see a great duo babysit. Extremely hilarious, I promise. T for language.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls, I don't own anything, except a ticket on a jet plane that will take me back home.**

A/N: This really sucks and the only part that I like is the ass part. You'll get it after you read it. Just don't be too mean with the reviews. I still want reviews even thought this really sucks. Okay here it is.

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Jam Hands **

Things are going to get better. How do I know? Because things can't get any worse. I'm caught at an impasse between two people- the man I think I love, and the man that I know I can never live without. I can't believe what he said! I can't believe that it's over. I guess that I'm sad, maybe I'm glad. I hate words that rhyme. I really don't know either way. But I do know that I have to call him, the other him, the him that I can't live without. I have his number; I just have to let the call go through. Damn him for waiting to pick up the phone. Okay, it's ringing. Wait, what am I going to say? I better hang-

"Hello?" –up.

"Jess?"

"Rory?"

"Hi."

"Hi. What's wrong?"

"I, um, I… I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For Logan. I'm sorry that he was a jerk."

"Rory, it isn't your fault."

"But he was my boyfriend, and he'll never apologize, so someone had to."

"Wait, did you say 'was'?"

"Huh?"

"Did you say that he was your boyfriend?"

" Uh, yeah. We broke up."

"I'm sorry."

"No you're not. I'd put money that you're doing a happy dance right now."

"Only in my head."

"Well, I really am sorry about what Logan."

"It's all good."

"Okay, well I better go…"

'Rory?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you want to do something this weekend?"

"Um, yeah, sure. That'd be great."

"Cool. I'll pick you up at 7."

"Yeah, 7."

One year later

That night was the best night of my life. Or at least the best night that I had in a long time. The best part was that we did it again. Then, we did it again. And now we're dating exclusively. It feels so good to know that a guy is just mine and not all over some blonde while I'm not looking. I know Jess has done it before, but never when we were together. I'm just so glad that Logan is gone. _Bring, bring. _Wait, that's my phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Rory."

"Oh hey Sookie. What's up?"

"N-nothing. How 'bout you?"

"Sookie?"

"That's your I want to ask something, but I'm too afraid voice. What do you want?"

"Well, I was wondering…"

"Yeah?"

"I was wondering if you could do me a huge favor."

"Anything legal."

"Um, would you watch Davy and Martha for me."

"Of course, anytime. Do you mind if I ask when and why?"

"Not at all."

"Sookie?" I said after a few seconds.

"Yeah?"

"When and why?"

"Oh, sorry. Well, this Saturday. Jackson wants to take me to this produce convention and I don't know who else is available."

"What about Mom?"

"Well, she and Luke are-"

"Going to New York this weekend. I remember. I'll do it. Just, can I invite a friend?"

"Absolutely. So I'll see you Saturday morning at 6."

"There's one of those in the morning to?"

"You didn't know?"

"Yeah Sookie, I knew. I'll see you Saturday."

"See you then sweetie."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Now, who am I going to invite. I don't want to be stuck in Stars Hollow all weekend without somebody fun to be around. I know.

"Hello?" A groggy voice answered.

"Did I wake you up?" I really don't care if I did or not, but hey, I always ask.

"Now that you mention it you did."

"Ah, well I'm sorry."

"No you're not."

"You're right. So hey, what are you doing this weekend?"

"I was going to take you out. Why? What did you have in my mind?"

"Well, um, I kinda got roped into watching Sookie's kids this Saturday, and she said that I could bring a friend. And well technically in some form or another you are my friend so…"

"You want me to come watch two little kids all weekend?"

"Please. I'll make it worth your while."

"Oh, you had to do that to me didn't you? You know how tempting that sounds, but jam hands Rory. Remember the jam hands."

"So we won't feed them any food that gets sticky. No big deal."

"But they always have jam hands."  
"You know what, you sound like Luke. _A lot_ like Luke."

"Take that back!"

"Not unless you come with me this weekend."

"Will you still make it worth my while?"

"Maybe."

"Fine. But only because you seduced me into it."

"That's the best way."

"Okay, I'll see you later."

"Bye Jess."

"Bye."

Saturday at 5 A.M.

_Buzz! Buzz!_ "GILMORE!"

"Hm?"

"WAKE UP!"

"Paris, why are you yelling?"

"Gilmore, that damn clock has been going off for over twenty minutes. I need to sleep; I had a big night last night. Now turn the damn thing off and get your ass out of here."

"Well, hey, at least let my ass be a nice ass."

"I don't care if you named your ass Rita, just get it out of here!"

"Sheesh. Come on Bum, we're not wanted here."

"You are too much like your mother."

"There is no such thing."

"Jess, answer your phone." I just got into Sookie's driveway, and I'm calling to make sure that Jess will be there soon.

"Hello?"

"Where are you?"

"I'm in my bed."

"JESS! You're supposed to be on your way to Sookie's house."

"I'm kidding Rory. Give it a rest. I'm about 10 miles outside of Stars Hallow. I'll be there in a few."

"You better be."

"I promise."

"Good. Now, I've gotta go."

"Okay, I'll see you soon."

"Bye."

"Bye."

I walked up to the door and rang the bell. Jackson opened it. "Hey Rory. Thanks again."

"No problem Jackson. Hey, do you have a problem if I take them outside or somewhere within the towns limits?"

"Nope. Not a problem at all."

"Okay."

"Sookie, are you ready?" Jackson asked is wife.

"Yep, all set." She turned to me. "The emergency numbers are by the phone, and if you need anything just go… Well, you know that if you run into the street and yell out anyone will come to help."

"Have fun you guys. Hey, when are you getting back?"

"Around 9."

"Okay, I'll see you then."

"Bye you guys."

"Bye Rory."

"Bye sweetie."

Fifteen minutes later Jess showed up, and he brought a surprise. "What is that?"

"It's an inflatable pool."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you bring it? Better yet, why do you have it?"

"I'm not sure. I just stopped at the store and picked one up, that's why I'm a little late. I figure the best cure for sticky kids is water, so if we just throw them in there then it will be alright."

"Sure, okay. I just have one question: Who are you and what have you done with my Jess?"

"Your Jess? Getting possessive are we?"

"Yes we are, me and Bum are quite attached."

"Bum?"

"It's a me and Paris thing.Now answer the question alien scum."

"Maybe this will answer your question." He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me into a mind-blowing kiss. I'm not talking even dynamite, I'm thinking more like Hiroshima type deal.

When we stopped for air I said, "Yep, you definitely are _my_ Jess."

Davy and Martha woke up about an hour later. They aren't too bad to take care of. Davy is almost three so if you set him in front of a toy truck he's good for hours, and Martha is two so if you hand her a doll she's happy too. Butwhen they get bored, that's you get a problem.

"Rory?" Davy said tugging at my shirt.

"Yes?"

"I'm bored."

"Well, would you like to go swimming?"

"Yeah! Yeah! Swimming is fun!"

"Okay, well, Jess brought you a suprise. He has a pool, and I'm sure if you asked him real nicely, he'd blow it up for you."

"Really?"

"Yeah, but you gotta be super nice."

"You got it, Rory. JESS!"

"What the-" He yelled as he slipped off the couch and onto the floor.

"He he, you're funny." Rory said laughing at Jess' expense.

"Yes, and you're evil. Why would you let me do that?"

"I didn't know that you would."

"Sure."

"Ask Jess real nice Davy."

"Jess, will you make the pool for us?" Davy is a smart kid, he used the puppy dog eyes, and even stone cold Jess can't resist the puppy dog eyes.

"Fine. I'll be out back."

"Yay!"

"Okay Davy, now that Jess is going to put up the pool, do you know where Mommy keeps the swim suits?"

"Uh-huh."

"Okay then, I'll go get Martha and you lead the way."

"Deal."

Once Davy and I found the swimsuits I took him and Martha out to the backyard.

"Okay, so here are the rules."

"Ah, do we have to?" Davy whined.

"Yeah, do we have to?" Jess mimicked.

"Yes, we have to. Now, no hitting, splashing, or diving. Don't be mean, and have fun."

"One last rule." Jess said.

"What rule is that?"

"Rory goes first." The next thing that I knew I'm being hoisted off the ground and thrown into the pool.

"Jess, you are going down."

We had fun that day. Sookie came home, and said we did a great job. I loved helping out the kids, and so did Bum. I think Jess liked it too, since now that we're married withthree kids ourselves.

THE END

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A/N2: I know, really bad, ultra horrible, a disgrace to writing of all kind. Just please let me know, because I really want to know how bad you think that I did. Review because we all love the color periwinkle! 


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